Paki Kēhua

The Ash Men (Part 2)

Episode 12 - The Ash Men – (Part Two) 
Bam takes Kore on a ‘classy’ date to a fish and chip shop called "Lucky Takeaways".  However, their romantic evening is interrupted when one of the Ash Men (a deadly entity from Kore's past) shows up. This Ash Man was responsible for the death of Kore's parents, and now seems to be targeting Kore. The situation is dire and Kore knows that the Ash Man will not hesitate to harm anyone who stands in his way, including Bam.  As Kore tries to find a way to escape the Ash Man's wrath, she can't help but wonder about Bam. Is he just a he-man fireman, or is there more to him than meets the eye? Despite the danger they face, she can't help but feel a sense of curiosity about him. 
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The Ash Men (Part 1)

Episode 11 - The Ash Men (Part One) 
Bam is a hotshot fireman that has (excuse the pun) “the hots” for Kore, a fellow firefighter.  The problem is that every time he’s in her presence, he gets tongue tied and his fiery passion is quickly extinguished... OK, I’ll stop.   
Kore's past is coming back to haunt her as an ominous entity from her childhood has reappeared, stirring up long-dormant embers.   
The heat is on for Bam and Kore to extinguish the problem in this fiery paki that is sure to set the story ablaze.  Sorry… I couldn’t help it. 
 
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Kiddy Karanga

Episode 10 - Kiddy Karanga (Based on a True Story) 
There's a reason why, in the time of our tipuna, only the pakeke of each whānau would perform the karanga: It's dangerous, and there are many rules to adhere to, including being a pakeke or a kuia. If you're a rangatahi, to put it bluntly, wairua can smell blood (if you know what I mean). Karanga on a marae raises the stakes - it's a wāhi tapu, and even what you wear is a factor. It should be a panekoti. "Whenua ki te whenua", as the old kuia would say. But most importantly, whenever you call out to the dead, you have to accept the real possibility that they might hear your call and answer it. Karanga is like the old party phone lines where anyone on the same party line could listen in. And just like a phone, anyone can pick it up and make a call - anyone. There's the 'never, ever karanga at night' rule, and the list is endless. The responsibility is enormous. Many years ago, I was at a wananga when a child wearing jeans stood on the marae at night and did a karanga. Oh dear... I didn't see it, but I heard about it. Everyone did. This story is a reimagining of the chaos that ensued. 
 
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The Unholy Spirit (Part 3)

Episode 9 - The Unholy Spirit (Based on a True Story) 
There's more at stake here than just an exorcism of two rather nasty spirits. The fact that both the father and the son are being possessed at the same time suggests that this is more than just a coincidence. Something more dangerous is brewing beneath the surface, an ancient darkness after more than just the lives of a father and son. Can this darkness be stopped before the spirit and the person become one and the same? If that happens, separating the spirit and the host always ends badly. Normally, it would make sense to tackle one spirit at a time, but Te Kani, the paranormal expert, has a gut feeling about these two spirits. He wants to let them face each other. 
 
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The Son (Part 2)

Episode 8 - The Son (Based on a True Story)  
“The Son” picks up where “The Father” left off. The father is possessed by a malevolent spirit, and you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to guess from the title that the same fate probably awaits his son. Now remember this is a true story…. with a bit of extra hot sauce and you should know before we go any further what we’re dealing with here….so you can choose whether you should listen to our next story or not. Last chance to turn back…. OK, now when the son (the real life one) was asked what the whole possession thing, he simply said the movie, “The Exorcist” was all true right down to the projectile vomit…. but this story is not about possession, we’re way past that. This is about how a spirit chooses its prey. How it hunts. Hand to hand? set a trap? or from a distance like a sniper. Put it this way, just knowing about it is enough for it to line you up in its sights, or reading of its existence like what you’re doing now….is enough. Once it knows that you know….it's just a matter of time. 
 
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The Father (Part 1)

Episode 7 - The Father (Based on a True Story) 
One of my jobs over the years was teaching kapa haka at the local prison. During my travels, I had come across a social worker helping Māori inmates cope with the harsh realities of prison life. He told me about an inmate, a relative of his, who was in the "Hannibal the cannibal" category - extremely dangerous, to the point of having to wear a face grill in public. However, this inmate was an old man, a koroua, who seemed unassuming and rarely spoke. But appearances can be deceiving. The entire prison, both inmates and guards, were terrified of him, and everyone knew to keep their distance. There was something about this old man that frightened everyone so much that no one dared to even look at him. The social worker was convinced that he could help this inmate, but he was about to learn two important lessons: first, that some people cannot be helped, and second, the real reason why everyone feared him. 
 
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Night Whistle

Episode 6 - Night Whistle (Based on a True Story) 
I can hear my koroua very clearly, with his dramatic voice, saying, "Never ever whistle at night." But Koro, why not? What's the big deal? We never actually voiced our questions, as we knew better than to challenge our elders. In fact, whistling wasn't the only thing forbidden at night. I remember my grandmother warning us, "Never ever cut your hair at night." I don't think she meant it simply because you can't see well in the dark and you might end up with a bad haircut. There was genuine fear in her voice. She didn't need to explain what might happen if we did. The very thought of the consequences was enough to cause concern. This story makes me wonder about the worst-case scenario. 
 
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The Talking Taiaha

Episode 5 - The Talking Taiaha (Based on a True Story) 
I know what you're thinking, it's metaphorical, right? Or, when you swing the taiaha, it makes a swishing sound and that's your taiaha talking. Or, the movements of the taiaha are a complex three-dimensional language. All of these are true. I teach these lessons to my tauira. But when our tīpuna said that if you listen carefully to your taiaha, it will talk to you, I don't think they meant it like the sound a basketball makes when it goes through the hoop. I know, "swish!" is another word for smart and fashionable. No. I believe that a taiaha talking to you actually means talking taiaha. I mean, if we can believe that our tipuna brought snow to our mountains on Tongariro and volcanic fire to the bowels of the earth, then a talking stick doesn't sound too much of a stretch. Our story follows the trouble that might follow if you did, in fact, one day have a good old yarn with your taiaha. 
 
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Pukapuka o te Mate

Episode 4 - Pukapuka o te Mate (Based on a True Story) 
In my family, we have an old book written in Māori. Because I was considered the Māori one in the family, I was invited to look at the book, but I declined..
The only thing I know about the book is that it is as thick as the Bible and was hand-written by my great-grandfather in the old cursive style of the time. 
Growing up, I heard stories that anyone who touched the book died, so it was kept locked away at the old family homestead in a cupboard. Twenty years or so ago, there was a fire that burned the old homestead to the ground, but every single part of the house was burned to a crisp except for one cupboard that held the book. 
I have heard of other similar books over the years, including an urban legend that this story is based on, about a group of hikers who were found dead in an old, abandoned church. The cause of their deaths was unknown, and the only clue was a curious book found beside their bodies. 
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One Spirit Too Many

Episode 3 - One Spirit Too Many 
One of my pakeke was raised by his koroua around the 1960s and 1970s. His koroua was a cannibal. I was always intrigued by what he was saying, given the time period, but we were too scared to ask, isn't that illegal? A few weeks ago, I came across a picture of his koroua on Facebook and saved it. But when I went to retrieve the picture this morning, it was gone. When I tracked it back, there was no record of it ever being saved. I feel another story coming on. Anyway, this makes me think of another tradition we have in Tūwharetoa. The practice of whetero has been outlawed. On the kapahaka stage or else where, if you're Tūwharetoa, you are forbidden to stick your tongue out, as that was a sign that you were a cannibal. That law may have been appropriate 200 years ago, but today, that would only make sense if there were still practicing canni...... oh, I see. 
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